More Buddhist

Something Buddhist. Here is a little update on the world and How It looks from where I'm perched or entrenched depending on the day and the hawks and snipers respectively.

View from Jacob's Bedroom

1. Work
2. Jacob
3. Gilty
4. Maria
5. Plans








6. Reflections

1.

I am working. A lot. This is a very good thing especially if it's a kind of occupational therapy. The school where I'm touting my trade is a religious school, except it's not very religious at all. In fact it's quite liberal and easy going. I am pretty much left to my own devices and I try very hard to repay the confidence lavished upon me by not being totally incompetent. The verdict is out. Technically, I work full-time at the school which is right next to the beach and the football stadium. In practice, I only work in the mornings and have my private classes in the afternoon, usually until about half past eight.

Maria and I have rented a small premises quite near the school and formed a limited company; Carter and García S.L. (the SL just means that it's a limited company). Maria has got her own money and my bank is amenable to the project so, it's a risk but well, we might all have an ususual strain of Huntingdon's Correa or Trumpist Brain-warp tomorrow. We have registered a business name too; Vox Box. The premises is small but in good condition and nicely painted so we only have to put up a few divisions and add some furniture and smartboards and that's it. Some students might come in handy too.

Security Guard

I have decided to curtail this post so as to make them shorter and encourage myself do do more.

Thursday today and thursdays are my best day:

 

Today's poem:

 

 Fleeting eyes of despotic marauders
desensitised clones bound to extremist orders
martyrs to a God non-existent, fake
pretending to liberate but instead they take

bone and flesh flying like bits of confetti
killing anything be it two or twenty
spreading their faith with blade and explosive
ideologies sickening, unjust and corrosive

unsung heroes, are we forever in their debt?
Their sordid acts spilling blood, tears and sweat -
tell me Radical, does God really give a sh*t
whether the bullet from your gun misses or hits?

They care for no one but themselves and their kind
stomping upon our future and leaving destruction behind -

watch out my friend, any stranger could be one of them
for its not a matter of 'if' but a matter of when.

The Brain

People who study animals would call it an adornment. It's like a peacock's tail feathers. They are too big and showy. Peacocks no longer live in the wild. Their tails make them easy prey. People´s brains make them stupid. Easy prey. Ten percent of your brain is a sophisticated animal brain , a badly programmed calculator. And you think it's you!!!! 90% is animal, beautiful balanced, and unhindered. It's a reptile brain.

Not to be confused with a reptile's brain.

BREXIT

So, this is how the debate reads so far. I kid you not, it’s practically verbatim:

Remainers (left holding the Brexit baby after the Leavers… left) “WTF?”

Leavers “We voted Brexit, now You Remainers need to implement it”

Remainers “But it’s not possible!”

Leavers “The People Have Spoken. Therefore it is possible. You just have to think positively.”

Remainers “And do what exactly?”

Leavers “Come up with a Plan that will leave us all better off outside the EU than in it”

Remainers “But it’s not possible!”

Leavers “Quit with the negative vibes. The People Have Spoken.”

Remainers “But even you don’t know how!”

Leavers “That’s your problem, we’ve done our bit and voted, we’re going to sit here and eat popcorn and watch as you do it.”

Remainers “Shouldn’t you do it?”

Leavers “It’s not up to us to work out the detail, it’s up to you experts.”

Remainers “I thought you’d had enough of experts”

Leavers “Remain experts.”

Remainers “There are no Leave experts”

Leavers “Then you’ll have to do it then. Oh, and by the way, no dragging your feet or complaining about it, because if you do a deal we don’t want, we’ll eat you alive.”

Remainers “But you don’t know what you want!”

Leavers “We want massive economic growth, no migration, free trade with the EU and every other country, on our terms, the revival of British industry, re-open the coal mines, tea and vicars on every village green, some bunting, and maybe restoration of the empire.”

Remainers “You’re delusional.”

Leavers “We’re a delusional majority. DEMOCRACY! So do the thing that isn’t possible, very quickly, and give all Leavers what they want, even though they don’t know what they want, and ignore the 16 million other voters who disagree. They’re tight trouser latte-sipping hipsters who whine all the time, who cares.”

Moon from the garden

OHHM

All is good. I have just had a nice very relaxing weekend. It was Graeme's birthday on Saturday so we went to a local eatery where they serve turnip leaves and pork and chick peas and spicy sausages and a thick broth full of deliciousness and marrow and goodness knows what else.

Speaks for itself one thinks. The Christmas tree, already a distant memory whizzing round in the vortex of history. or not. I planted it in the garden and this one looks like it's going to survive.

Gilty, while now an elderly puppy, has received a second wind. He is vibrant but wobbly, a bit deaf but cuddly, in love with the rain and the wind, but always willing to come inside.

A plate for about 56 people. Over here, appetites are measured in terms of lorry drivers.

Hallucinogenic bottom cushioning experience 

Today's poem;

Adam's Curse

By William Butler Yeats

We sat together at one summer’s end,

That beautiful mild woman, your close friend,   

And you and I, and talked of poetry.

I said, ‘A line will take us hours maybe;

Yet if it does not seem a moment’s thought,   

Our stitching and unstitching has been naught.   

Better go down upon your marrow-bones   

And scrub a kitchen pavement, or break stones   

Like an old pauper, in all kinds of weather;   

For to articulate sweet sounds together

Is to work harder than all these, and yet   

Be thought an idler by the noisy set

Of bankers, schoolmasters, and clergymen   

The martyrs call the world.’

                                          And thereupon

That beautiful mild woman for whose sake   

There’s many a one shall find out all heartache   

On finding that her voice is sweet and low   

Replied, ‘To be born woman is to know—

Although they do not talk of it at school—

That we must labour to be beautiful.’

I said, ‘It’s certain there is no fine thing   

Since Adam’s fall but needs much labouring.

There have been lovers who thought love should be   

So much compounded of high courtesy   

That they would sigh and quote with learned looks   

Precedents out of beautiful old books;   

Yet now it seems an idle trade enough.’

We sat grown quiet at the name of love;   

We saw the last embers of daylight die,   

And in the trembling blue-green of the sky   

A moon, worn as if it had been a shell   

Washed by time’s waters as they rose and fell   

About the stars and broke in days and years.

I had a thought for no one’s but your ears:   

That you were beautiful, and that I strove   

To love you in the old high way of love;

That it had all seemed happy, and yet we’d grown   

As weary-hearted as that hollow moon.

Beautiful but tinged with a bit of melancholy. 
Could do without that. Need rather more sillyness today!

Cauliflower

There is no cause for alarm. Ever. My watchword will be "equanimity" from now on.

Help!!!!!!!! (loud scream!!!!!!)

See, I didn't even flinch. Even though there is a tiger that is only partially asleep upstairs.

Dangerous, Protected Species

The garden is looking wonderful. I bought a rose cutting from the local supermarket a couple of years ago for about 2 quid and it´s now a fountain of exorbitant, gushing largess. It smells of tropical sugar and marmalade and the flowers are enormous when they fully open.

The holly is doing it's "get ready for Christmas" thingy...

And the locals have the grape harvest in-hand.

Gilty is making sure all remains in order

...and setting off for work is more of a Buddhist experience when inspired by nice views

..From bedroom window

Today's poem:

Brahma

IF the red slayer think he slays,   Or if the slain think he is slain, They know not well the subtle ways   I keep, and pass, and turn again. Far or forgot to me is near;         5   Shadow and sunlight are the same; The vanished gods to me appear;   And one to me are shame and fame. They reckon ill who leave me out;   When me they fly, I am the wings;         10 I am the doubter and the doubt,   And I the hymn the Brahmin sings. The strong gods pine for my abode,   And pine in vain the sacred Seven; But thou, meek lover of the good!         15   Find me, and turn thy back on heaven.

Who or What Is the Red Slayer?

.......The first line of the poem refers to a "red slayer." In the Hindu social system, members of the military belonged to a caste known as Kshatriya. Because a person in this caste typically burned with a fiery temperament that made him a formidable soldier, he was associated with the color red. Thus, the red slayer is a Kshatriya warrior. Kshatriya is derived from the Sanskrit word katra, meaning rule.

Theme

.......The theme of "Brahma" is this: Human beings can find fulfillment and contentment only when they realize that they are part of a universal entity.

Meter

.......Each line in the poem contains eight syllables. The dominant meter is iambic tetrameter, in which a line consists of four pairs of syllables—the first syllable in each pair unstressed and the second stressed. The last two lines of the first stanza demonstrate the pattern:

.........1...................2................3................4
They KNOW..|..not WELL..|..the SUB..|..tle WAYS

.....1.................2..................3................4
I KEEP,..|..and PASS,..|..and TURN..|..a GAIN. 

Lines 1, 5, and 6 appear to break from this pattern by placing stress on the first syllable of the line. 

Rhyme

.......In each stanza, the first line rhymes with the third, and the second rhymes with the fourth. 

Point of View

.......Assuming the role of Brahma, Emerson presents the first fourteen lines of the poem in first-person point of view. In the last two lines, he addresses the reader, using second-person point of view.
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Summary of the Poem

.......The Hindu god Brahma tells the reader that what appear to be opposites—a warrior and his enemy, remoteness and nearness, shadows and sunlight, and shame and fame—are really the same. Anyone who does not believe this truth lives in error, for all these things are part of the essence of Brahma—the eternal god who is beyond human understanding—and therefore are unified in him and are the same. Even a hymn sung by a Brahmin, a Hindu priest, is part of Brahma's essence. Other Hindu gods—such as Yama, the lord of death; Agni, the god of fire; and Indra, the warrior god and god of rain—long to live in Brahma's essence (line 13), as do the holiest Hindus of the past (line 14). Brahma ends the poem by telling the reader that if he finds his way to Brahma's essence he will have all that he needs for all eternity.

A real and brilliant example of poem that actually rhymes and scans, built on a structural framework that requires inspiration, hard work and craftsmanship. 

I just read an anthology of prize-winning poems from last year. Practically all junk, no rhymes, no proper meter and they didn't scan. Only intellectual rubbish. 

Ed astra

A long, lurid journey into the night.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=1120468571331252&id=100001043583366

The time is wrong. Or right. Or wrong. Who knows or cares. - This is turning into a very difficult time. Difficult. Jacob's mother is trying to take him out of the school .She's just being bloody-minded but might do a lot of harm to Jacob. The fact that she gets legal aid means that she can go to court for free but I'm legally obliged to take a lawyer which will probably cost another 1000 euros. She has also appealed against the joint custody ruling. That's going to cost about 1500 Euros. I'm pretty much buggered and there's not a lot I can do.

Cycling by the river near the house

I have to confess to a radical time-lag. It's now the end of August and about 6 or 7 months since my last sentence. So here are some pictures which are much more eloquent.

Mid August 2016

He has been teaching me how to play basketball. A very good teacher he is too!

...And two weeks later..

The holidays are now coming to an end but, of course, I have no grounds for complaint. Long, languorous days and the sun are a balm for all wounds. 

Syrup died but her passing away was relatively peaceful. Gilty aged overnight as a result, changes in the merely physiological which will test our equanimity too. 

"This physical body is not me, but that which I use. These emotions are not me, but that which I control. These mental images are not me, but that which I create."

Today's poem:

Destitute

I walked the walk,
I planned the route.
You baulked the talk
You spurned my suit.
I'm destitute.

Love from afar
A bitter fruit
To raise the bar
Would be astute
I'm destitute.

Within us all
Resides a brute
Whose house will fall
Just like the fruit.
I'm destitute.

It's in your head
Your peace, your caste.
Your home your bread;
Your wealth is vast.
You're home at last.

Defenestration

The Danger of Windows

Yes it's true. Windows can be very dangerous. They get good publicity, but  it's all lies. They hinge on hinges. They let light in but they won't let it back out again. There are windows of opportunity, but these tend to be skylights in vaulted roofs. It's no coincidence that a piece of glass for a window is called a pane. Double glazing is doubly painful. Internal windows. Those are what we need. I'm going to try and open my internal windows and have a long hard look at the boundless expanse of irrepressible life. And when I've stopped being optimistic, I'm going to be more optimistic.

Somebody likes stale bread

I noticed that the pecking order is reminiscent of the Spanish political scenario. It's anarchic, violent and just a feeding frenzy among a bunch of low animals only interested in getting fat and listening to themselves cackle, squeak, trill and waddle about preening themselves. But somebody likes stale bread.

From a couple of years ago now

Only missing the shotgun and a brace of grouse

And then suddenly, it's today. All over again.

Today's poem:

I the window

You opened me to air your friendless rooms

Lay bear the threadbare tapestries of charms

Exonerate the wealth within the gloom

And bathe in light that finds you in my arms

You opened me but then forgot the storm

approaching through the casement eye, the lie

Within the framework of a childless sigh.

The ledge invites; renege what's safe and warm!

Through windows framed the ever-present tense
panes of pain reveal that nought makes any sense
I am the glass that shields you from the rain
Fragile, invisible, your recompense.

Don't jump darling because nobody cares,
Don't leave by the window, leave by the stairs!

   

   

Christmas 2015

Not finished yet, still not enough chocolate

What better way than to start the new year than with a resolution you will forget as soon as the wind changes direction. So here is a list of things I will promise to do and then forget as quickly as possible.

1. Get up at seven o'clock every day
2. Eat more fresh fruit
3. Eat at least some fresh fruit
4. Substitute a banana for the 5 kilos of chocolate I eat every week
5. Stop smoking (this one should be pretty easy)
6. Levitate
7. Write a best selling novel and then donate all the proceeds to acrobats without frontiers
8. Meditate on the futility of every reaching an understanding with any public body
9. Throw my telephone away
10. Go out on my new bicycle a second time (recycle more)
11. 
    

Garden and a bit of house

Am currently replacing a couple of the upstairs windows. The only two that now need replacing. Bought them from a DIY shop and they look quite nice. These correspond to the two upstairs windows that overlook the garden. So, if the eyes are the windows of the soul, windows must be the soul of the eyes and since everything is green at the moment, the outlook is good.

Float or Bounce

 Good glasses. They help you to not see anything. 

A pic from two years ago; "Cathedrals" beach 

Pretty summery at the moment over here. Are we in winter? Is the earth really warming up? Yes and yes! Loads of stuff is flowering in the garden but it's half past eight in the morning and it's still black as pitch outside.

Across the bay is where I work

Still love my job thanks, in no small part, to the absolute liberty I have to organize everything I do and the fact that all of my classes have been compressed into the morning. 

Now it's Christmas and time for a poem. 

Come to me in the silence of the night; 
Come in the speaking silence of a dream; 
Come with soft rounded cheeks and eyes as bright 
As sunlight on a stream; 
Come back in tears, 
O memory, hope, love of finished years. 

O dream how sweet, too sweet, too bitter sweet, 
Whose wakening should have been in Paradise, 
Where souls brimfull of love abide and meet; 
Where thirsting longing eyes 
Watch the slow door 
That opening, letting in, lets out no more. 

Yet come to me in dreams, that I may live 
My very life again though cold in death: 
Come back to me in dreams, that I may give 
Pulse for pulse, breath for breath: 
Speak low, lean low 
As long ago, my love, how long ago.

Yin yang

This is a quicky. Acceleration means that everything is beginning to look like a long haired lovely in a wind tunnel. There are lots of issues and stuff in the potentially explosive cupboard.

1. Court case for custody; has just been suspended for the second time. The reason now was that my lawyer didn't show up. The procurator told me 24 hours before the hearing. The lawyer didn't even bother to tell me herself.
2. School contract stuff; partially resolved. Have signed the contract but there are still one or two issues, namely that I should be being paid about 47 euros a month more. I am looking into ways to address this situation. I love my job because I am given absolute freedom to do more or less whatever I want and, I only work in the mornings. And it's mega fun.

Now that's a garden

    3.  Health. good with a few caveats; back, infections, ebola, typhus, typhoo and PG tips.
    4. Number four is a question mark which is difficult to address. Or name or blame or abstain. So I           won't.

Jacob is going to be with me this weekend which is fantastic. He is the little boy in the picture. He is the smile and I am that gruff frown. It's strange, but when I am at school I am completely different, laughing and joking, doing strange and silly stuff all the time and every day. It's not a facade either. It just suits me well, like an old well worn jacket.

out of focus

Today's poem:

Poem 6

It's tight and taught
And terse and fraught
Much, much too short
To be but nought.

It reads right through
My bloodless glue
cursed versed yet true
The poem is you.